Sunday, January 20, 2008

SUNDAYS WITH JASON

Oh the cold is only getting colder, and it sure is getting older! But me; I am counting down the minutes to Friday when I hop on a big winged bird and head down to Florida. Sorry folks, if I could take you all with me, I honestly would. (Not just because I would rather hang out with total strangers than see my grubby old step dad, well, maybe that’s one reason why.) Not to make fun of him but, you all know how the step-parent thing goes…. you can’t live with ‘em and you can’t stuff them in a sack. Enough said?

So I apologize for the last couple weeks, I feel like I was losing the battle to complacent, ill-motivated, useless words. (Like every Sunday, only worse) So, hopefully we can kick it up a notch today, what’d ya say?

There were some crashes this week, one of them deadly and fueled by the combination of high speed, alcohol and ego. The result was a couple injuries and a dead driver. Just another story of a 30-something driving in his fast car inebriated and totally irresponsible. But, you know what I am about to say, better him than me. At least he didn’t kill anyone but himself.

This week was bone chilling; I think the weather may have kept the fire gnomes underground because we had no plague of buildings burning to the ground this week. Yay for us.

But the all-powerful Mr. Smite, not to be out-did by Mr. Good Fortune, raised the bar on danger this week. Puzzled? Let me bring this new subject to light. The past months we’ve been dazed and confused by a surge of old people attempting vehicular homicides. These “old drivers” put their lives (and the lives of others) in danger, somewhat obliviously. Well, if that isn’t bad enough, not only do we have to watch the road for old drivers; now we have to watch the sky for “old flyers.” This week we have had 2 small aircrafts crash under the control of pilots over 6o. Don’t get me wrong; I am not trying to make light of a sad situation. But, I think some investigation is on order. I read that in order to keep your private pilot license current, the FAA requires that you complete a Biennial Flight Review with a flight instructor every two years. Every 2 years? If that is true, perhaps when you get to be over 60 it should be a little more frequent. These pilots may have been totally “competent” but that’s not my point. At least it was an even playing field before; I just had to watch the road. Now I am having a moon roof installed so I can watch for “falling, flying, fogies!” So, be afraid people, be very afraid; and HEADS UP!

Last week I did not touch on the subject of the Cage Fights, although it got plenty of attention and started the whole “new courthouse” drama. I personally love a good fight and especially when it is regulated and governed by a high set of standards. But, the people who really have a problem with it should consider their options. Would you rather have people let out their aggressions (or practice their hand to hand combat skills) in the mall, on your block, or in your face when you cut them off on the road? Or, would you rather they get their “rage on” in a cage?


I personally think that it is a great idea for these guys to have this sport for an outlet. Let’s all get this straight; they are not a bunch of bloodthirsty maniacs either. Hand to hand combat has been both a sport and an ancient art form as far back as 1022 BC. It’s not like people just recently started punching each other in the face and decided to make it into a public exhibition for the heck of it. This is an art. If you are a regular reader of TMC you are well aware of what “violent” fighting is; it’s the stories we read about where knives and guns are pulled on people. It’s the stories of lovers shooting lovers, and strangers stabbing strangers. Or even worse, the stabbing in Elyria this week, which was so ghetto of a fight that neither bozo wanted to tell their story. They were probably embarrassed that they couldn’t get in an argument without someone taking a shank in the chest. Now that is real violence.

Cage fighting is not violent, it may be graphic, but violence is done from a hateful heart; that is a heart these athletes just don’t possess. These guys are athletes and passionate about their sport; I am in awe of their perseverance, stamina, will and strength. Anyone can say something derogatory about a “fighter” until they meet one, (or need one when they get into a situation they are too weak to handle). Me personally, I always keep a “fighter” on my buddy list. To open my jar of pickles or help open my car door when it’s frozen shut. I may not be a big “sports buff,” but I’d rate this “grade A” entertainment!

Well, let’s all bundle up and check on someone “elderly” to make sure they are warm and cozy too. Remember that kerosene heaters only work when they have KEROSENE in them. Don’t forget to make sure the smoke from the fireplace is actually ESCAPING up the chimney. If you have to run your gas oven to heat up the house, just make sure the pilot light is on and that your head is not in the oven. Finally, a great way to stay warm in these cold months is to cuddle up with your lady, just make sure your wife doesn’t know about it. (Bah-dump-dump-ching) Thanks folks I’ll be here all week, you’ve been a great crowd. You in the first row, you’re quite a looker; you’ve got a great face for radio.

Okay, I’ve got to go. I’ll try to touch base with you all next week; If I am not to busy basking in the golden sun on the white sand beaches, or peeing on sting ray sores. (All of which are so fun) I’ll bring back seashells for all of you. Just send me $9.95.

Be safe, be smart and be silly.


Jason

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